Thursday, September 09, 2010
Sigh
Booo...he got a work call and he has to leave tomorrow to report Sunday for his next assignment way the hell up north. Losing a whole day with him. Dang. But it'll be fine it always is. Just will miss him being home. So blessed to have him 24/7 when he's at home though. Totally makes up for his working weeks at a time away.Rocking my new "librarian" hair do, figured out a few ways to style it up rather than ponytails....see I'm capable of personal growth. ha!
Princess has now graduated up to mowing my yard as part of her weekly chores which is great news for my back and Duchess inherited some more chores so it all works out in the end.
Now I'm gonna sit back and watch as Dave grouts and finishes the coffee table that I was suppose to finish three weeks ago. I told him as I'll tell you....that is outside of my skill-set.
Tomorrow I'm gonna blare my music, pray travel mercies over my husband and clean my house to keep busy while my babies are at school. And thank the sweet Lord Jesus that Fridays are no homework days. Good grief they have some homework these days. I have to say it's nice though that it's all study for test work or spelling work or review work rather than "shit the teacher didn't get around to teaching them so mom can do it" work. I am so in love with this school district!
Life is truly so short and we only get one shot at this rock. This was a discussion that I had with a Verizon salesguy who was setting up Dave's computer with an air card (so my baby can have school access no matter where he's sent to work, and lets be honest so he can relax with gun and/or hunting porn...the guy really does read forums on guns....fascinating). We briefly talked about all the places we'd lived and he asked if we'd seen the Redwoods in California while there. I told him it was a very very special place for me cause it was the moment in my life that I realized that I was totally a spec in this universe and that the world was full of people just like me that were going about their daily lives with no to little thought outside their own little arena. Now that conversation is just popping around in my head.......gotta live outside my little box some I guess.
And tomorrow, I'll tell you all about the one job interview I've been on down here. Oh boy, it's a doozy....totally what I get for thinking of going back to work. Should just shut up and enjoy the time I have at home, lol.
Till then,
H4G
Labels: About me, Ponderings
Thursday, April 29, 2010
*Comes with Warning Labels*
I should come with a few warning labels. You know like that bottle of pills. Instead of those beauties, I've been thinking of what my "labels" should be and since I'm attempting to curb my potty mouth let's see how to word these appropriately:WARNING:
- highly allergic to stupid people
- irritable before noon, speak at your risk
- is not couthe: will argue politics, religion, and gas matters at dinner settings
- has no uterus but still capable of PMS
- is not short just fun sized but will still throw a tall girl fit
- has short temper, will throat punch without warning
- is Southern so when she says "bless your heart" in a sugary voice it means "eat sh*t and die"
- drives like she stole it
Did I miss any?
Labels: Ponderings
Monday, January 11, 2010
Louisiana Trip
Memory lane is a long winding road. I don't go home often. I worked so hard to leave that little town behind a long time ago, yet it seems that that laidback, slow little town still holds alot of appeal. I'd never move home but I've realized that something similiar is what I'm looking for, to raise my kids. But visiting is great, especially when it's been 5 years since I've been back home. I got to see my family and meet my newest little cousin. My kids got to take the brief trip down my memory lane, like they did Dave's in Tulsa. It was a great trip.
Best of all, being back with my family. I got to hold Dave's hand while walking the areas that made up my childhood. My old house is literally falling apart, abandoned and so very sad. But that is okay, time moves on. My old high school looks tired and worn out. Not nearly as fun and lively as when I was part of a graduating class of 75 people. You can't really go home and frankly that is okay with me. But it was great to see my family. Who dropped everything for our last minute visit and not only had a big ole cooking but made sure to cook something I could eat.
There really is nothing like Louisiana; the moss hanging from the trees, the homes spread out on large lots with big ole trees, doors left unlocked while people are at church. It really has a certain appeal. I love being from the sticks. But those sticks just aren't for me. One day we'll settled in some other sticks, somewhere else.
But for now, we're mobile. And I have a trailer to finally get organized. Rv living with pics coming soon. (As soon as I find a place for everything, school starts officially on Wednesday so I have to get busy!)
Labels: Bible Belt, Ponderings, Welcome to the Boonies
Thursday, July 09, 2009
Walking on Faith
It's not easy to blindside me.Over the years my optimism has been dwindling. I tend to look for the worst possible thing/trait/route at from the start now. I hate that. But I struggle to see my glass as half full.
Got blindsided. My basket is full and I'm worried about dropping an egg or two, or dozen.
I keep thinking that the Lord will show me the path we need to be on, especially since the new year we've had one blow after another. Yet, just when I throw my hands in the air and kick a wall thinking that I've hit my limit........another blow.
July has been a doosey of a month.
Princess is having surgery next Monday. Nothing too big just worried about possible complications with her eardrums (she's having her tonsils removed). The hard part was the quickness with how necessary the surgery was. Poor baby. Good news, I have insurance through my job and this is the first time I've really had to depend on it for something other than a doc visit and I must say, I'm not impressed with it. Damn people, with what this surgery is costing me I'm wondering why I pay premiums at all? Don't get me started on insurance outside of the military, I will explode.
I have no daycare as of yesterday. Things went down beyond my control (which I utterly hate, OCD much?) and I lost my shit. I wish I was kidding, but I was a cooked goose yesterday. Went so far to scream "F*ck This" in the middle of my conservative, LDS workplace. Dear God. Yeah, you read that right, I lost it.
But hitting a brick wall and crumbling has its own rewards. The Lord stepped in not 3 hours after I hit my knees at my desk and just gave it up. Cause I couldn't carry it, couldn't fix it, couldn't think. I live in the freaking boonies. I compute to work.......yet there are very very very few daycare options out here. Women with kids stay home. Period. Yet 3 hours after my little mini-nervous-breakdown the Lord gave me a really really good fix.
The kids will be spending the next three months with the photo elusive retired cop stepdad of mine. Cause honestly, there are few few people I trust with them more than daddy. He'll come over to my house and hang with them so they can play outside and etc. It never occurred to me until I looked at his face when he opened the door and gave me a hug. I slept just fine last night.
Dave is testing tomorrow for his certs that will allow him to accept a perm position with that company (he's been contract) which means benefits, more traveling and stability for him. He's worked his butt off and he's doing so well.
Wish I could say the same.
Feeling like a spectator in my own life right now.
But my glass is half full.........
And I am on level 7 of Mafia Wars, which kicks arse considering I just started "killing" last night. Not bad..........not bad.
Labels: Are you serious? Why yes, Ponderings, yes I am...
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
Ponderings
I'm lost.Feeling like the rut I'm stuck in has 14 foot walls.
Need a step-ladder. Need something.
I've always had a plan.
I ain't got a plan this time.
Damn it that really disappoints me.
Labels: Ponderings
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Oh Crap
I know better. Really I do.But last night I couldn't sleep, so I watched this and Lord have mercy on my stupid self by the end I was a babbling sobbing mess.
Pity party for one.
Which totally explains the sad, weird dreams.
I needed extra lipstick this morning, to distract from the bags under my eyes.
Tonight I'm watching this.
There is no telling what kind of crazy dreams I'm gonna have tonight.
Labels: Ponderings
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Several thoughts...
* Even in 3 inch heels, I'm still the shorter one of thebunch......fark!* Proof that I can find joy even in work situations, which make me very uncomfortable
* Notice the cleavage..... as in the lack of in my case...... cause I actually heard a comment about how much of my chest was showing...... hello UTAH. Breasts are illegal.
* The only one NOT skiing at this work function, but they sent me to the spa.....which explains the great hair.
* Some of these peeps are actually the sweetest, most innocent people God ever put on this earth. I feel like I corrupt the very air they breathe.
These are a few thoughts that struck me when they finally sent around the pics from our last ski day.
And for the smart-arses who can't find me in this pic, cause:
* I'm wearing makeup
* I'm not in a hoodie
* My hair is not in a pony or a bun
I'm in the middle. The short one. With skin showing.
Is anyone hiring in the South? No ski days are a necessity.
Labels: Ponderings
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Thank you's
A little tiny piece of the notebook I'm carrying with me these days:"I'm thankful for..."
- friends who love me, even when I suck and don't call/email cause I'm a shit
- that my kids can wipe themselves even if they don't always flush
- Murphy eating his doggie bed, cause really I was tired of looking at that extremely comfortable looking bed sitting in the corner
- the Mexician place down the road, which saves me from cooking
- the tummy pills I have on hand that are needed after said food
- my ipod, cause it keeps me sane at work/cleaning house/yard work
- the smiles and hugs I get even my kids think they are grown
- the 4 inches of height I still have on Princess
- my mom who loves me even when I'm moody
- the gas station next to my work that provides Frasil icey drinks to keep me going throughout the work day
It's important to remember to be thankful for the little things in life......start a list peeps!
Labels: Ponderings
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Please Please Please
let me, let me, get what I want......this time. Okay, little dramatic but the Muse cover of this song keeps playing in my head.What do I want?
What isn't coming easy...... isn't that always the case?
Labels: About me, Ponderings
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Shiney...ohhh
I'm mesmerized. My brother brought the kids' an xbox last week (cause it was just sitting there not being used, let them use if for awhile.......sucker bait, I'm totally going to have to splurge at Christmas for their very own now, sigh) and it sat unplugged for a week cause I couldn't figure out how to watch a movie on it. Yeah, I'm not so good with things that need plugging in.So tonight he plugged it in for the kids to play lego people games, fun times. Rowdy too, dang. But then he put in my new fav CD and showed me how to use the menus and blah blah blah. But then, he put the screensaver on..........ohhhhhhhhhh. Shiney, bright, colors.
I'm a sucker for stuff like this. I've listened to it three times in a row, just watching the purty colors go by. Thumping to the tempo. The kids and I painted every nail in the house tonight in front of the rainbow of colors. Slightly redneck of me, but I'm totally in love with this feature. Now, if you'll excuse me......gonna see what this thing does with some different cds, seriously wondering how fast the tempo thing can go.
I'm kinda a nerd.
Labels: Ponderings
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Cleaning baseboards, floors and etc.......why am I trying to keep myself busy?
Music on repeat in my head right now: Blue October
Labels: Ponderings
